Động lực

The first part of the first chapter: On Motivation. Discover why most people can't motivate themselves effectively, and how to set goals the right way! Comments appreciated! (self.FoundationGuide)

The following is part of the first chapter to a comprehensive guide to self-improvement. I'm in the process of writing it, and it will cover topics like Motivation, Socializing, Fitness, Diet, Grooming, Dating, Occupation, and much more. When I'm done the book will be released for free in its entirety. If you are interested in contributing, I would love your help! Please leave a comment below to share your thoughts, and/or join the subreddit here at /r/FoundationGuide. Thanks!

I. The Problem of Motivation Many people see motivation backwards to the way it actually works. Perhaps you think that first you must get motivated, and that gives you the energy to accomplish things. That is backwards. Typically, people accomplish things, and that success motivates them to do more.

Remember that motivation is an emotion. Emotions do not come from nowhere – they are a response to your circumstances.

Your circumstances include your health, your home, your relationship (or lack of relationship), your job (or lack of job), your friendships, your accomplishments, and other aspects of your life.

Typically, very motivated people have good circumstances, while very unmotivated people have bad circumstances. Your circumstances drive your motivation, which in turn impacts your circumstances.

The good news is that you have the power to change your circumstances, even with very little motivation. Improving your circumstances will boost your motivation, starting a cycle that leads to a better life.

II. The Solution Don’t focus on getting motivated. Instead, focus on making small, concrete steps that improve your life in measurable ways. Motivation will naturally follow.

No step is too small.

Focus on Health (water, food, sleep, anything else), Hygiene, Home, Family/Friends, Job, Hobbies/Interests/Anything Else in that order.

To start with: If you are reading this and your Health is lacking – if you are thirsty, hungry, tired, or unhealthy in any way – take care of that immediately. Get water to drink, food to eat, or go to bed.

If you are not taking care of your physical needs, your mood and the rest of your life will be negatively affected. On the other hand, if you are sleeping enough, eating well, and drinking enough water, your mood will be boosted along with your physical wellbeing.

After Health comes Hygiene. If you feel dirty, you will feel unmotivated. If you have not done so, do the following: brush your teeth, wash your face, shower, comb your hair, or shave. If your hair is too long or messy, get a haircut. Even minor changes like these can greatly improve your outlook on life.

After Hygiene comes Home. If your room is dirty, clean it. If you are seriously unmotivated, even that may be too demanding – instead, simply make your bed. This is one of the reasons why JBP says to clean your room; a clean and organized environment leads to greater motivation and sense of efficacy.

After taking care of your Home comes being with Family and Friends. In some ways, this is the most important part. If you are depressed or suffering, your friends and family would be happy to help you. Call them up and ask for help. Even if you are not in a bad mood, face-to-face socializing is extremely important to human wellbeing.

The key takeaway is that your mood is highly dependent on your lifestyle. Eat well, drink well, get enough sleep, take care of your hygiene, be active, and be social with friends and family. All of these things will make you happier and boost your motivation.

III. View Goals and Objectives Correctly Similar to misinterpreting motivation, many people confuse goals and objectives, or do not know how to set goals properly. You may be familiar with this if you set a New Years Resolution, only to confront it again months later and find you have made no progress.

Think of a goal like a goal in sports. The goal of soccer is to get the ball through the net at the end of the field. However, although every soccer team is trying to accomplish that goal, none of them set "get the ball through the net" as their strategy. That would be way too simple! Instead, soccer players set objectives, such as "pass the ball to my friend" or "dodge that opposing player", that are prerequisites to achieving their goal.

In other words, a goal is generally a far-off aspiration, while an objective is something you can do right now. "Get physically fit" is a goal; "get dressed and go to the gym" is an objective. "Be healthier" is a goal; "make a doctor's appointment" is an objective.

In general, think in terms of objectives, not in terms of goals. Whenever you set a goal, consider the smaller objectives you will need to perform in order to reach that goal. This will keep your focus on the tasks at hand that lead to real progress.

[This chapter is still a work in progress; if you liked it, or if you have any criticism or suggestions to share, please leave a comment below! Merry Christmas!]

GET MOTIVATED Remember there are many people in the same position as you. You are not alone. Make achievable, quantifiable goals. Goals should be very specific. For example, rather than setting a goal to "clean my room", say "make the bed". The latter is more specific and achievable. Setting even a small goal and achieving it is far more confidence-boosting than setting a big goal and failing to achieve it. - Don't bite off more than you can chew. Going cold-turkey almost never works, and should you fail, it will only hurt your self-esteem. Rather than trying to change your life overnight, make a small commitment like "I will make my bed today," or "I won't drink soda today." Try making a small positive commitment for today right now. If you have trouble getting out of bed: Set your alarm away from your bed, so you have to get up to use it. Set alarms on multiple devices, one outside your room. If you're addicted to using your phone after you wake up, buy an old-school alarm clock. Finally, wear warm clothes to bed so it's not too cold to get up in the moming. ⚫For overcoming addiction: Since we give into temptation mostly when we are weak-willed, if you make it more effort to give into temptation, then you will do it less. For phone or computer addiction, lock your phone or computer in your car overnight, or put them in another room. You can also lock away an essential piece, such as a PC power cord or phone charger.

One way to cut down on addictions is to turn them into delayed rewards.

For example, rather than trying to do NoFap cold turkey, you could promise yourself "I will abstain from fapping until my birthday in 2 weeks."You can also turn addictions into rewards for tasks completed, such as "I will only have a piece of cake after I get this difficult assignment done." Alternatively, you can set limits on how often you do bad activities, for example "I will only smoke once a week."

• Don't underestimate the power of socializing and work, and sleeping and eating right. Keeping yourself busy, and avoiding isolation, will improve your mood and cut down on bad habits. Try to sleep 8 hours a night and eat healthy foods regularly. Your physical health has a significant impact on your mood.
• If necessary, seek professional help from a therapist or psychologist. This One-Page Guide is part of the Foundation Guide to Self-Improvement. Look up the full book for free info on exercise, grooming, dating, and more.